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How to Make Money Online Even if You are a No Talent Clown

Most of the Internet marketing blogs out there preach that the two main things that you should concern yourself with are good content and good traffic.  This advice leads to no less than ten people a day telling me that they are too stupid or lazy to write good content.  They say, “EBR, I am too stupid or lazy to create good content.”  Well, this article is for those people.

I may be the smartest and wittiest person that you know.  I am good looking too.   These assets allow me to write the stunning articles that you crave so badly.  I am under no illusion that you possess the same God given talent as me, so I do not expect you to be able to create content for a website that people actually want to read.  Don’t let this get you down, as there are ways around your lack of these assets.

The thing that you need to know is that most of the articles that you are reading are written by posers.  These people couldn’t sell a coat to an Eskimo.  Instead, they invent an online persona that makes you think, “Wow, this guy could sell tons of coats to Eskimos.”  So, from now on, stop reading worthless tip articles and just stick to doing things that make money.

I’m not knocking good content and traffic, but what I am knocking is the idea that these are the end all be all of Internet marketing.  You can make a good living without spending your days writing content.

So, here are three easy steps to making money online if you are too lazy to create good content.

Step One: Start Collecting Ebooks or Creating Content for Ebooks

There are thousands of websites that offer free “how to” ebooks on just about any topic.  Many of these free ebooks come with redistribution rights.  Some of these eBooks cost money, but allow you to redistribute them.  You can do a search for PLR (private label rights) or MMR (master resell rights).  Start collecting those ebooks.  Download them into a folder on your computer every time you come across one.  It doesn’t matter what topic the ebook is, as long as it teaches something that you think people will want to learn.  I do, however, suggest staying within niches that are profitable.  A couple of example of those niches are Internet marketing or anything financial related, i.e. mortgages, forex trading, etc.

You could always write your own stuff too.  I do a combination of both.  I love PLR material, because it gives me a platform to work from.  I change some things that I may disagree with, add my own thoughts, and throw my wisecracks in there.  Vuala, there you have it… an ebook by me.

Step Two: Create a vehicle to give these ebooks away

Even if you are the most ignorant Internet marketer on the planet, you can still have a great looking one pager that gives away free ebooks.  These sites are usually referred to as “squeeze pages”.  You don’t need talent for this either.  Thankfully, there are a lot of countries with poor people that are willing to create great one page sites for next to nothing.  And these people are waiting in the chat forums for people like you to hire them.

I actually have a great tool that will allow you to create video squeeze pages in under five minutes.  You don’t even have to create the videos.  You can check it out here: http://ebrsqueezepage.com/

If you are set on outsourcing the creation of squeeze pages, then a good place to start is at the Digital Point Forum.  Foreign designers hang out there because they know that this forum is filled with no talent ass clowns that need their services.

While at the DP Forum, DO NOT read any of the threads there.  They will make you dumber than you already are.  There’s nothing like a few hundred of the biggest losers all giving advice to each other on how to succeed.  (I recommend some good forums that you can actually learn stuff from in my newsletter, which you will receive.)

Head to their Services category and make a post that says you need a simple one page site that includes a signup form to give away a free ebook.  Tell them your budget, even if it’s only $20.  There are lots of talented designers living in grass huts that will do anything for $20.

Step Three: Get the word out about your free giveaway

There are many ways to let people know about your new site that is giving away your free how to ebook.  One cheap, and by cheap I mean free, way to get the word out is by hanging out in chat forums that cater to the niche that your ebook is.  Add a link to your signature file and just start chatting about the product.  Don’t mention the giveaway in your posts, as they will see it in your signature.  If the forum has a “Freebies” category, then you can post about it there too.

If you are writing your own ebook and your niche is in Internet Marketing, then a great place to build your list is at the Warrior Forum.  WF is a chat forum for Internet Marketers like you.  It is the most professional forum of its type that I have run across.

At WF, there is a special forum called the WSO.  That stands for Warrior Special Offers.  In this forum, you can pay $40 to list any work created by you.  This forum receives tons of traffic from people that are searching for the latest and greatest marketing tools… and they usually find them there!

Most of the WSO offers cost money.  Your offer will be free and you will say so in the title.  Free WSO offers generate a lot of list names.  In your ad, you will tell about your free product and then provide a link to your squeeze page, where you capture the visitor’s name and email address.  You can set your autoresponder to deliver the ebook or product and then your regular series of emails.

Here are few other ways to get the word out about your free how to ebook:

  • Add it to every free stuff directory you can find.
  • Spend some money on an AdWords campaign.
  • Go to all of your neighbors houses and scream that their house is on fire.  When they come outside, tell them you were just kidding, but you have a free ebook that they should download.

So, how do you make money from this exercise?  Boy, you really are dumb.  You have just built yourself a list of people that share a common interest.  You will want to provide your subscribers with interesting and valuable content on a regular basis.  You can make use of PLR articles or ebooks for this.  The key is to make them like you by providing them with some great valuable content for free.

Once you have them on your side, they will take your affiliate recommendations seriously.  I don’t recommend just grabbing affiliate links and bombarding your list with them.  Instead, pitch products that you already use by telling them how these products have worked for you and providing an affiliate link where they can get the product for themselves.

Now you can go back to all of those bloggers that said content is king and tell them to kiss your…

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9 Responses to "How to Make Money Online Even if You are a No Talent Clown"

  1. LMAO… hey E this has been the best blog post I’ve read in a LONG time man! Your humility and shyness really come through. A man after my own heart! “Tell them your budget, even if it’s only $20. There are lots of talented designers living in grass huts that will do anything for $20.” LOL That was golden!

    Looking forward to some more of these ‘ass clown’ contributions of yours amigo.

    Many Blessings,
    Jerold

  2. E Brian Rose says:

    Thanks, Jerold! I try and tell it like it is!

  3. Will says:

    Hi E,

    I’ve got to say your killer-Lists is a real no nonsense cut to the chase report that just makes the whole list building thing so so easy (and I have been in to list building for some time now).

    At the end of the day a major part of list building is the traffic and you just supplied it – the WF!

    It really is the fastest way to build a list in reality.

    Take note guys!

    Keep up the good work

    Will

  4. Rob says:

    E-
    I have to say that you are a ROCKSTAR! I was laughing all the way through this post.

    You free ebook offer is the smartest thing I have seen in a very long time, so I am going to have to take all of the stuff you said about yourself as 100% true…

  5. Yes, sometimes I wonder how many people is successful in those forums. Good article, easy strategy.

  6. mikehuff says:

    You sir, are the shit. Seriously. As a beginner that makes a good wage working late nights serving drunks at a bar, I find it tough sometimes to kick myself enough to actually get going. Gonna try it again.

  7. Brett says:

    Hey E,
    Great blog! I found you at the WF and thanks for the Squeeze page generator.

    I am finally going to start building lists and I need someone that is smart, witty, and good looking to help me out. I read this post and almost sprayed coffee all over my monitor! LMAO

    I’ve got a face made for radio and a tendency to over-analyze but I am a determined dumb-ass clown.

    Thanks,
    Brett

  8. Hey Brian, what’s the E. stand for?

    looking forward to the software webinar/training tomorrow!

    Cheers,

    Tony.

  9. Just read this post and I got to say EBR is the man for real, especially when you talked about DP lol

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